Last Thursday on Smackdown the writers had another of their melodramatic spells that some fans have had more than enough of. The Big Show, having lost to Eddie Guerrero (who he relieved of the US title not long before Guerrero finally ascended the whole damn heap), lost his job, and decided he wasn't going to go easy. Torrie Wilson played damsel in distress (last time she was in something like this role her dad was being seduced by Dawn Marie; in fact, that was pretty much the last non-Playboy thing of note she'd done), and then Kurt Angle, GM, stepped in, and wound up chokeslammed to the pavement (maybe a good ten feet or so down from the catwalk this drama culminated at). Angle landed no doubt on cumfy foam or the like, but for drama's sake, he was next shown with his leg artificially torqued and a pool of blood beneath his head. In two days we'll see what condition he's in, and see what'll happen to Big Show, who only makes headlines when he's being a monster. Being news and being a big guy sort of went out with the cat when the business went to the big men. Andre was the last of a breed. Now the only unusual guys left in the business are cartoons and goons.
This was the big event for Smackdown in the halfway point to its next PPV (and counteract to Backlash, the Raw I'm getting to next). Bradshaw will apparently get to warm up for another month, hopefully with some actual miles clocked in the ring again. I don't suppose he'll still be wearing his black APA tights, but who really knows? Hopefully his tailer. Or maybe some guy named Taylor. Booker T and RVD were supposed to carry the main event, but apparently that wasn't big enough. The match ended by DQ, and probably only served to define Booker's new character. How does Van Dam feel to be the guy known for his wrestling, who doesn't get to be known for his wrestling when it counts? When will be the next time he counts? Maybe Paul Heyman will swing by. And do what I'm not really sure. Apparently the ECW rumors were false, and now there are WCW rebirth rumors to replace them. Who really knows what's cooking? The people who will be eventually served. What results is what we'll know for sure. And it took intense thinking to figure that out...
So at Backlash Chris Benoit legitimized his reign as world heavyweight champion by defeating once more Shawn Michaels and Triple H, at the home Earl Hebner's infamous screwjob made. It seemed the Canadian fans were more interested in booing Earl and Michaels for something that took place seven years ago (Bret Hart's WWE exit has become a legend that may eclipse what he did otherwise in the ring during his career). It's the same spirit that marred Goldberg and Lesnar's WrestleMania match a month ago. Sometimes I don't know whether the fans actually care for the wrestling or for the mystiques and for what they as a presence can accomplish (American Idol Syndrome, I guess). So was Sunday Vince's atonement for that night, giving Benoit a decisive win upon another decisive win, against Michaels and another wrestler plagued with an ego reputation? Isn't this funny that we're talking about this because a guy who always liked to boast he was the best there is, was, and ever would be? Was Hart more upset that the fans never embraced him quite as much as, say, Michaels or Hulk Hogan? I don't really care...
Chris Jericho got his win over Christian and Trish Stratus, Randy Orton his over Mick Foley (shades, once more, of Triple H). Victoria defeated Lita. The Hurricane and Rosey made an appearance, defeating La Resistance (Conway & Grenier), but were upstaged by Eugene and Regal (as far as I could tell). Edge got his seen-from-a-mile-away win over Kane. Coach defeated Tajiri with Garrison Cade's assistance. Um, go Coach & Cade! Shelton Benjamin defeated Ric Flair. Woo! I think that's about it. A fairly strong card, probably translated to a fairly decent night.
The next night (last night) Edge went right back to familiar ground by recapturing tag team gold, with Benoit. Is this really what he needs? Or maybe the thought is, Benoit's recent boom (reminds me, I really, really miss Boomtown, but Fox has a series coming this June called The Jury that sounds intriguing, so I might have a replacement-of-sorts) will rub off on him. Could happen. Edge is still relying heavily on the Spear, which even Rhyno (his was called the Gore) back off from after returning from his neck surgery. Maybe it's perfectly safe. I dunno. Benoit has been doing roling suplexes like there's no tomorrow, and he's still doing his flying headbutt.
Speaking of possibly not learning anything, Jericho and Christian...are...still...at...it! Maybe they can do this and not completely spoil their careers because they're both in better positions than Scott Steiner and Test were when they did the same. But...When was the last time Jericho really factored in with the championship scene? Why isn't Christian pursuing that little snot Randy Orton? I know, I know, Orton is a a roll of his own (against Foley, but that methinks might finally be over) and is said to be the longest reigning Intercontinental champion in seven years. So what if he hasn't really been defending it? Is there a plan in place where he'll actually do so, and do it successfully? Or is Shelton Benjamin poised to relieve him of it in the near future? I have no idea! I also have no idea who this "big man" Tyson Tomko, the CLB's extra muscle, is. For all I know, it could be Chuck Palumbo, but that'd be a pretty specific name change. I don't think that'd happen. I have no idea where this is all going! Haven't I already said that???
Kane moved along from his most recent upset by focusing his attention on Lita, who will apparently not be tagging along with Y2J after all. Bummer, but at least it gives Matt Hardy something significant to do again. Garrison Cade might be receiving a similar push, right into a feud with Tajiri! Let's see if this goes anywhere, much like Mark Jindrak on Smackdown, where Rico made his debut last Thursday, and apparently he's still a gay character in this latest push.
Closing thought: Pedro Morales managed to wrestle to great acclaim in the 70's without becoming an ethnic stereotype. Could he do that today? And just what was it about Vince MacMahon's sports entertainment vision that scared Bruno Sammartino away in the 80's? Bruno was not above engaging in a silly Russian feud in his days. Is it okay when you have a real conflict as a backdrop to do silly things? Many would argue that Sgt. Slaughter's Iraqi gig in '91 was not all that amusing, especially now. I guess I wouldn't really know, because I wasn't around (really) back then, to see pro wrestling in its previous incarnation. I could watch some tapes, maybe, to try and figure it out, but aside from expanded approaches to story building and the lengths some are asked to push (see Angle anecdote above), could things have really changed that much? I suppose the real question is, should we expect Bruno to reconcile first, Bret Hart, or for hell to freeze over?...
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